Adventures in Online Dating

The television advertisements tell us that, "everyone is doing it". Does that make you feel more comfortable with finding a date and maybe even a nice relationship online?

I thought the idea was pretty good, even before the sites inserted themselves into my evening's mindless entertainment on TV. I've heard from countless friends that so-and-so found so-and-so who ended up being their soulmate through online dating. Trouble for me is that after quite a few dates I am no closer to finding a soul mate than I was before.

After filling out the tortuously endless personality questionnaire and parting with some hard earned cash, I had really hoped my matches would suit me. Sadly, that has not been the case. I am a woman of a certain age. I have a couple of nearly grown kids and a decent career. My dream date need not be as handsome as a movie star, wealthy as a rock star, or famous in any way for that matter. All I really want is someone who works consistently, enjoys being with me, and likes to eat.

I am active, fairly athletic, interesting, and tend to spoil those around me. Also, I am rather pretty. So what is the problem?

For me, I think it is time. From the time I had filled out the questionnaire, communicated with the prospects and planned a meeting, I'd lost interest. That or after few dates, the formality of the whole endeavor sucked the possibility of romance right out of me. I learned that you have to be willing. You have to be receptive and you absolutely have to be prepared to meet with people. You have to meet with people several times to judge if there is a spark.

No spark of interest between you? There isn't much you can do to change that. After getting over the excruciating awkwardness of a first date, you've got a little common ground. By the second date, if I am not feeling a connection is that enough? Do I keep seeing him, hoping eventually the spark will ignite? Does anyone have a copy of the rulebook?

One thing is for sure. I've been in love, and I've been in relationships that were just convenient. Being in a relationship with someone you can love is something to work for. It is a legitimate goal. I'm going to keep trying, and investing the time!